Sorry for my lack of updating as of late. Here's why...
Monday was one of the very best days of my life!
Wednesday was one of the very worst days of my life! Like, Ever! In the history of days! AWESOME!
Sunday night, I was called to go and labor sit with BF SS. She was having contractions regularly, and her hubby needed some rest badly. So, we sat and talked and laughed until laughing was not a possibility, then called our doula. We sat up all night, went to the hospital in the morning, and her little cherub came into the world on Monday at 1:03 p.m. I actually got to catch the baby with the midwife. I KNOW! Seriously! She's beautiful and perfect. Mama was a TOTAL rock star - no meds at all. This little girl and I will always have a special connection, being that I was the first pair of hands to welcome her into this world. The connection between her mom and dad and I has only been made stronger, if that's even possible. The whole family is doing well, and I can't wait to visit again to get my hands on that little angel. She was even named after me in a way, but they haven't announced her name to everyone yet so I'm keeping my mouth (fingers) shut.
After 34 hours of being awake, I spent Tuesday resting and sleeping.
Wednesday I woke up to the news that our bank had screwed up and returned a deposited check that Husband had put in the ATM on Tuesday because it was 'not endorsed'. Long story. It was endorsed. They're idiots, and now we're totally screwed financially. Nice. The tension of that situation caused Husband and I to have some words in the morning, which were resolved in short time, but still.
The next lovely event was appointments with my OB and midwife, where I learned that I am Group B Strep positive. This means that I will have to have IV antibiotics (hence, my baby will get them too, before she is even born) every 4 hours during my labor. And if my water breaks before I go into labor, I will have to do ALL of my laboring at the hospital. Not. Cool. This is not what I envisioned at all, and it is very upsetting to me. I know, knowledge is power blah blah blah. Best to know now blah blah blah. This was not supposed to be the way. It seems that every time I take a g.d. test, having a great positive attitude and not fretting about the results, the f-ing results come back positive. First gestational diabetes, now this. What else will it be, huh? What??
In addition, my oasis for the afternoon - visiting my BF SS and her little adorable cherub that I just want to eat up - had to be canceled because I wasn't exactly feeling up to par. Instead, I went home and worked on stuff that needed to be done. You know, because that's super fun.
And for the final dose of shittiness for my day-that-couldn't-possibly-get-worse-right??, after bawling my way through my acupuncture appointment I had to spend an hour and a half on the phone with my health insurance company, pharmacy, and doctor's office to get my allergy/asthma prescriptions - that I have been taking for, oh, I don't know, TEN YEARS NOW??? - covered by my plan and refilled at the pharmacy. Because, no meds + forsythia and cherry blossom season = 9 month pregnant lady gets sick for sure. I also found out that I overpaid last month by $100, and will have to go through filing a claim with my insurance to get that money back.
I then comforted my distress with Burger King and a glass of white wine. Yes, I know. Horrible. But being in a place of total self-pity and morbid depression does not make one feel like there is ANYTHING on this earth that I can POSSIBLY eat because you know I have the f-ing DIABETES so what the hell! Fuck it all to hell! I'm eating the WORST thing that I can possibly imagine and I will ENJOY EVERY MOTHER LOVING MINUTE OF IT.
Maybe Wednesday wasn't the worst day of my life, but it sure felt like it. And it still does. I feel totally defeated in my efforts to have a healthy pregnancy and an intervention-free labor and delivery.
Now I'm off to read about Group B Strep, to see if there are any other alternatives to the IV and come up with a plan with my doula. Wish me luck.
**Update: Today is a much better day. I woke up feeling good, physically, and had a long talk with my doula. She has supplied me with lots of statistics and research and information, and I'm feeling much more empowered to make a choice about my situation, rather than allow a choice to be made for me out of fear. AND I get to go see our little Raindrop this afternoon, caring for her whilst her mommy and daddy have massages. :)
